Parenting advice : be kind to yourself

No seriously, take a breath and be KIND to yourself. My friend bestowed this wisdom on me within the first month or two while I was sobbing on the phone to her. I reacted with a ‘yeah good point‘ response without truly listening to what she was saying. There was no time to be kind to myself. I existed to be a mother and that was it, there was no time for me. But this is where I was wrong. There is time if you really want it. There are lots of ways you can be kind to yourself whilst still dealing with the enormity of being a first time parent….

  1. Take several deep breaths and stretch to relieve any built up tension.
  2. Take a bath and read something non baby related for once – try to find something easy to read and allow yourself a moment to just stop worrying about your baby.
  3. Say yes when family or friends offer to help – it doesn’t mean you are a bad mother for taking five minutes to sip your tea/go to the toilet/have a little cry.
  4. Meditate – it can actually be energising as well as calming! Five minutes is better than nothing.
  5. Go for a walk. The fresh air will help to revive you. Try to really notice what is around you – the birds in the sky, the breeze on your face etc.
  6. Book a massage – get those aches and pains rubbed out of you as soon as possible. It makes such a difference as you won’t realise how tense you are post birth.
  7. Book a haircut/eyebrow threading/anything that makes you feel a bit more like you.
  8. Eat the cake – with all the lack of sleep you need something to keep you going on those long days and now is not the time to diet
  9. Drink a smoothie when you can – balance out the bad with some good to fight germs (now is not the ideal time to get ill)
  10. Sleep when the baby sleeps – this is key to survival.  Do not try to go the whole day sleep free because you want your life back – you will be up in the night without a doubt so just give in and accept that for now, your baby is your sleep dictator.
  11. Cry – allow yourself the chance to cry, your hormones will be going crazy and sometimes you just need to let it all out in one big blub fest
  12. Watch a TV series – allow yourself the chance to watch something you have wanted to watch for ages, you will have plenty of time in the middle of the night to do this whilst the baby is awake and it will keep you from nodding off
  13. Wear the maternity jeans for as long as you want. No-one will know, no-one will care.